Friday, May 21, 2010

In the sea of faces..

I know I'd never forget him. It's not his friendship. It's not the way he talks. It isn't his music. It isn't his anger. Or love.
It's that factor he held in him to make me look back twice. For me to trust him, if not anyone when things were bad. 
He knew the way out, or the way to forget. 
He couldn't figure himself out, but he could figure me out. 
He couldn't figure his own scattered life, but he fixed mine into a mosaic of colors. 

Gigs with him were like a night of a new life altogether. When he screamed his passion, I felt the music harder. When he closed his eyes to touch the notes of the bass, I'd find peace in the distorted note being played by the guitarist.
At times, he would lose himself and surrender his conscious to the even flow of melody, and when he'd open his eyes, I'd see moisture in them. And I'd then see him swallowing that lump that formed in his throat. It wasn't just the music, it was her- he remembered. It didn't matter if we were listening to Metallica, or Indian Ocean. It didn't matter if what the speakers produced was Sufi music or Lamb of god.
He knew music too well, and he knew her- a little better.
So everytime those eyes closed, and opened, I saw those strangled feelings and memories that weren't even allowed to cry.. They were just allowed to leave a glisten of moisture- suggesting they were there,that they  were still killing him inside, and that they'd be back again. 


His strength to over power her image and return to consciousness gave me the inspiration to love music and the strength to let it over rule me for a while, and give me my chains back again.
His strength to keep his love hidden for her, gave me the will to slowly pick up the distorted pieces of my life and learn to bear pain and move on with everything around.

She never knew the insane and unconditional love his heart and mind held for her. His mind was beautiful. It portrayed her to be an ocean of white, with a little tinge of red vermilion in the center. His mind sketched her a beauty, a creation of god, in it's true sense. 
She felt for him,too. But alas, not everybody has the power and heart to look away when they say "Rumor has it......". And like those countless lovers who wanted to find destiny in each other's eyes,once again, She- another ordinary girl fell into the shallow institution of lies, stories and..... distrust and doubt. 
She left him.

As I look at him,now, today being one of those rare evening gigs, when a drop of sadness slips from the corners of his eyes,I close my eyes for I didn't want the moisture in my eyes to meet those eyes searching love in the sea of faces, trying hard and harder to just find a single pair of eyes, a single face.. An only ... Her. 


But that never takes away,from the canvas of my mind, what my eyes saw and his closed eyes showed..





31 comments:

  1. You're amazing,Cherr.
    Whatever can I say? I missed you,yo. Your writing always messes with my head, you know that. Get here Cherr, I'm gonna call you soon yo! I have so much to tell you =)

    Amazingly written as always Cherry, missed your blog- I went and figured =D

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  2. I seriously doubt you are 16... you are just 2 good :)

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  3. Beautifully written. Especially the last line "But that never takes away,from the canvas of my mind, what my eyes saw and his closed eyes showed.. " Genius!
    And you thought you had writer's block *sceptic cough*

    By the way, will there be a sequel? And what about Amartya's story? Are we continuing it?

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  4. Very well written. This piece just touches you somewhere. :)

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  5. @Ro: You're baccckkkkkkk! I missed you,too! Eee I missed you saying "you mess my head up Yo " !
    you're back!
    you're back!
    :D

    YES sir,you call me SOON. VERY soon!
    Hahhaha you took it seriously when I said go figure?! :O
    Lol, dumb ass! :P

    Hha call me! :D
    Shit you're back!

    And thanks! I'm super glad you liked it! :D

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  6. @Sid: Haha I'm still 15. Going to be 16 :P
    Aw thank youuu! dude,you make my day!

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  7. @Charu: why thank you sooo much darling :) Haha YES I DID have a baaaad writers block! It was really bad :/

    The sequel... hmmm.. will have to think about it :)
    And amartya's story.. no I don't think we're continuing it. I have some more of the experiments lined up for my readers ;)

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  8. @Shiv: You were the first to read it <3 so thankyou! Your comments were much needed!

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  9. really...how old are you??

    shobhaa de still cant write like this

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  10. Diptiiii! Awww you JUST freaking made my day! That was very kind,really.
    Thankyou :)
    And i'm 15 :D
    Going to be 16 :(

    but, thank you! :D
    Hugs!

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  11. Firstly...Very well written..so ChEeRs :)
    " She felt for him,too. But alas, not everybody has the power and heart to look away when they say "Rumor has it......".
    This to me was the most significant part of the Scene up there.Musicians have a bad reputation in the general minds.And musicians from the Rock n' Roll fraternity have'em just a little worse.
    A friend went through a similar phase as portrayed in this article...An exact similar situation...
    Midway through my comment on ur work as I think more of wat i just read,i realise...I love this one...

    "...I try to let go,but I know
    We'll never end 'til we're dust
    We lied to each other again
    But I wish I could trust..."_Megadeth(Trust)

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  12. I agree with what you felt. Sadly, I don't get this mentality. Music is a fine art, and I'd rather respect one whose chosen that path to tread on others.

    Thanks big brother :)
    I'm glad you liked this. I particularly wanted your feedback on it,and now I'm happy and content!

    Those quotes in the end - Respect.

    Much love to you!

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  13. Wow, lovely and moving. As Sid said, it is just amazing to think you are so young...you show far to much perception...maybe you have the memories of 1000 lives in your consciousness.

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  14. @Wicked: Wow, I'm SO glad to see you back on blogger! Your comments were much missed.
    Thanks! Aw all of you are just too kind.
    Thank you for encouraging my writing and perception so much. It gives me pleasure to find that you all enjoy my thoughts and my mind =)
    So much love!

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  15. @Ramit: Wheeeeee! Thankyou thankyou thankyou!!!! :D
    Aww <3
    and heyy! you better be doing better healthwise!
    Hugs!


    @Dipti: And I mean it when I say you're a sweetheart :)

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  16. wonderful poetry, nil! love and music--two of my favorite things. :)

    http://cherylclarke.blogspot.com

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  17. uffffffff ....... too good ... the waith was worth the while ...... :)
    khub bhalo likhecho .......
    hugssss

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  18. Really AMAZING!! I felt that... it was written about me.. um... i could relate to it, actually; the charater was so much like me....so.. :D :D Well done!!Probably the BEST you've written so far!

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  19. You've changed it since i last saw it
    :| :| :| :|

    But I like nevertheless.!!

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  20. @Cheryl: Aw thanks hon! You sure do always make my day!
    <3

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  21. @ML: Thankyou Didi!!! thanks tonnes for all your encouragement!
    I sure do treasure it.
    Much love,
    tithi

    p.s- Huggggzzzz!! :D

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  22. @Nandit: Yeah? you felt that way!?! hmm..I see! Well,Im glad you liked it. Awww bests?! Eeep I'm flyin' high now! =D
    Thanks man!
    Thanks bunches!

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  23. @Ujjwal: All I changed was the last line.. But thanks :)

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  24. This is much better, eta Oshmita's storyr theke onek better. Koyekta spelling mistake ache, otherwise khub bhalo.

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  25. beautiful, beautiful writing :)
    i could really connect with it at some level, but the weird part was, i couldn't understand, on what level...
    but what the heck, that made the connection stronger..really nice :)

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  26. Thank you so much, both of you :-)
    thanks tonnes!
    cheers.

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