Hey there.
The month of September was a dog. October...isn't quite lifting my spirits up. Although I'm supposed to be all kicked about the pujas, but I just feel real bland and bleh.
It's been a rush lately.. I've been either socializing or been completely underground for long periods of time. Both, provoked by tonnes of things.. however that never stopped something or the other coming up.
I don't think I've had SO many tiffs with people ever, I don't think I've felt so upset on things that shouldn't matter. I've been wanting to write, there's been SO much in my head, but it's almost like the moment I start typing, every thing screams in my mind, but godamnit doesn't help me type, not even a bit, not even at all.
The past month has been that of realizations, too. I realized certain huge losses that were somehow ignored by my own eyes.. just that I'm not too sure if the losses are mine, in actual..
doesn't make sense?
Oh I know. Doesn't to me either.
I've been shopping like a retard. I've been expressing myself a little too boldly for a lot of people to handle. [Lol, whoever said blatancy was appreciated?] .. and well, things have just been too quick for me to be able to catch up.
I'm sick of my phone. I'm sick of being connected all the time. It's usually not with me much,these days. So I'm sorry if I haven't replied to your texts/calls. It's just one of those phases when I'd rather listen to quiet than music. Where I'd rather keep a straight face instead of a mosaic of reactions that it usually is.
The whole world seems to be living in Delhi all of a sudden. CWGs start from today, although the day seems relatively quiet. The roads seem fine, and well, the TV I haven't bothered opening cause I really don't need a thousand news channels stating the obvious that I've been hearing since like 83490404 years, yes the games have begun... and lets just hope they bring us no harm, if not anything.
God I sound so pessimistic to my own ears :|
Not good.
Ok bye people.
Have a nice sunday :|
-Nil.
i relate to the sick-of-being-connected and need-to-go-underground parts of your post..hang in there :)
ReplyDeleteps: i like the new look on the blog!
ReplyDeleteSigh. Well I can't really blame you man. September? This YEAR has been a total bitch. And 11th grade was supposed to be THE year. God! It was THE year of ABSOLUTE MESS! Now, I can only hope 2011 will be better!
ReplyDeleteYeah about the loss.. I didn't really understand what you meant? But imma call you and you're going to explain.
We both need a break. PERIOD!
On New Year's Eve. I'm going to call you and we can bitch all we want about this year. And then we can totally raise a toast for 2011. (I'll stick with orange juice *rolls eyes*)
<3
can you beat this..i have been saying "i need a break " so often that my colleagues at work are saying ..tera symptom ho gaya hai mujhe "i need a break wala"
ReplyDeletewhat pessimistic shessimistic?? you've been shopping like a retard. that's a thing even i want to celebrate. period!
ReplyDeletehave fun girl. do your own thing.. always always always.
i know that 'being connected all thetime' thing. gets annoying for me too.
i've been underground for way too long, thats unhealthy. so yeah, maintain a balance. i got carried away, love my solitude more than anything. but you don't realise when it starts affecting you mentally.
this year was such a mess for me so i can relate :P
ReplyDeleteI so so need a break too.....wonder when that happen....but ur still in those wonder years...so give ur thinking brain a rest and just live in moments...u will remember them when u out of school...take care and smile suits u better :)
Interesting post. A great little glimpse into 'the life and times of Nil'.
ReplyDelete;)
Still, liked it.