The month that was, the one saved by Floyd.

January. January. January.

Remains of New Years night :')

I have a resigned smile on my face as a type this, for I have an overwhelming amount to say. Hell, I have so much to say. It makes me a little nervous to think that just maybe this month was (already) the high point of 2012. The very night of 31st December bought in a whirlpool of epiphanies (the kinds that made my jaw touch the ground. No,literally.) I've been keeping those epiphanies in my pocket (drafts on Blogger ForTheWin.) and the fact that I've only updated twice in the whole month kind of makes a poker face at the obvious.

My Homies from ze Batch of 2011-2012 :')

School's over. Yes. I'd always imagined typing this on blogger ...but now that I have, it doesn't feel as real as I thought it would. Scribble Day and Farewell happened on 27th, and with that ended a constant undertone of comfort that's been since 14 years. Though it hasn't quite sunk in yet, probably wouldn't for a while. But it's been drifting in and out of my mind, appalling me, and disappearing again.

And now, what's left of the next month- February- is for an intimate relationship with textbooks, occasional Mind-Screws, rare empty fridges, owl hours and aloofness from the worldly household. Should be fun, eh? :|
But then I'll do it. I'll do it just so April the 16th feels right, feels legendary, feels the way I've been anticipating for it to be. (Multiple reasons here, don't sweat it bros.)

Besides all of that, it's the same old at my end. But then again, feels drastically different. Too many changes in one go are kinda leaving me on my toes trying to peek as far as I can at the rough sketch of Highs and Lows coming up. The fact that I have no idea where I'd be 3 months from now doesn't help. But that's when the stereo in my head plays Floyd and the rest is History. :)
January started from Floyd. January has been saved by Floyd. At multiple levels, it's almost unreal. But it's kept me sane with very sweet insanity. :)
(Don't try and read between the lines, your eyeballs will turn around your sockets, believe me.)

So yes! That was a quick catch up that I owed big time to this strange month :)
The next month's blog archive is rather unpredictable. It can be a whole lot of fiction or multiple back-to-back rants (bless yer souls, if so.)
But that's for later. Till then, adios World. Kindly go make the most out of the fact that you're not stuck in a Board year which immediately alters every word and action you're entitled to, and honor that gorgeous detail with a whole lot of partying and happiness!
While I.. yeah, well. I'll just be hogging on Milano/ dissing at the world/ writing like a lover/disappearing from the face of the Earth and yeah- Studying. A whole lot at that. -.-

Photo by Vanta.
Our ultimate Big Field staircase chill sessions in school.. of bunks/recess/monsoon happiness. Sigh.

Signing off,

Nil. 

P.s- "We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year." 

Myriad coherence.

Myriad Coherence. 

You walk straight into that anatomy,
the skeleton of withered roads,
the grid of an architect,
an emancipated soul, his.

You finally find an avenue,
one that is prolonged,
one that seems comfortingly solitary,
one that would let you walk,
in conversation with annihilated philosophies of reason.

You find blessedness,
under the concave mosques of Cedars,
your mind is unperturbed,
while your heart is the capitol of your reality.

Heaven is lucid, heaven is simple.
It's been within you for so long,
you just haven't let it breathe.
You've begged for it to be quiet,
among your preoccupation of Chases.

But then you tame your mirth,
you look daggers at the momentary mirage,
as you see a fork ahead,
and you must choose again,
your much celebrated avenue ends there.

But then the bitterness dissipates,
your frown finds place in laughter,
in your naive understanding of the globe around,
where each and every alley,
finds another route,
engages in confluences,
despite your prejudices.

Heaven is lucid, heaven is simple.
It's been within  you for so long,
heaven has been... in this myriad coherence.


-Nil.

Shine On You Crazy Diamond.

"Can't a man just be happy?" was his answer to my risen eyebrow, questioning the abrupt subito smile of his, which had a question lurking somewhere in that crescent shaped happiness of his.  A question whose alpha was the night of celebration, the last night of the year. The night when every face had a haze of intoxicated wonder; of happiness, sadness, retrospect, nostalgia, regret, contentment. The night when the cause of each and every emotion felt could be found in the flirtatious sweet little nothings of the night, of that one person you somehow find in the confluence of so many people who cheer to every mistake and every hour of joy for the year that was.

The clock struck 12, and the world rose their toasts, embraced, some kissed, and some... sat in silence, and waited for the wishes to end, the year to start, and for something to begin.. Something, that came without a flag, without a warning. In his case, it was a song. And quite subtly, that song entangled me into its trance of thoughts which brew like quiet vapors of romance, of hushed smiles, and of sweet..very sweet denial.

The room was dark, all the light we knew was that of the shy remains of the Christmas tree, which glorified the shadow of an eyelash here, a frown there, and a smile hangin' in the whispered conversations and deep warm breathing of the other that sent ripples of goosebumps on my skin before it could recuperate from the one before. Fragments of conversations would be remembered the next day, which is why we gave in and let the alcohol speak, and counted on amnesia for the next day's laughs and winks.

If there was to be an hourglass for that night, it would be a weeping one. We'd make the sand stay clenched in between our fingers, we'd hold on till the last call of the pupil to beg for some slumber, we'd hold on till we could refrain the urge of floating into sweet unconsciousness, we'd hold on to time till we found its track again.
Hours sweeped, and our arrogant ignorance to it was never too appalling to the both of us. Ironic how the first sunrise of the year was ignored in pure bliss, perhaps because there was too much of warmth in the fluidity of words that brushed past the blushes on our cheeks ever so often.

The night ended, dawn cracked, morning peeled itself, bold rays of sunlight pinched our irises which still protested to stay unbolted, to be stared at, to be looked into.

And while the day took onto newer revelations...epiphanies from the last night flirted around the corners of our minds dancing to the quiet tunes of that one song... Shine on you crazy diamond.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And there y'go. First piece of the new year!
-Nil.